Traveling Engineers and Accountants

Three engineers and three accountants are traveling by train to a conference. At the station, the three accountants each buy a ticket and watch as the three engineers only buy one ticket.

“How are three people going to travel on only one ticket?” asks an accountant.

“Watch and you’ll see,” answered an engineer.

They all board the train. The accountants take their respective seats but all three engineers cram into a rest room and close the door behind them.

Shortly after the train has departed, the conductor comes around collecting tickets. He knocks on the restroom door and says, “Tickets, please!” The door opens just a crack and a single arm emerges with a ticket in hand. The conductor takes it and moves on.

The accountants see this and agree it is a clever idea. So after the conference, the accountants decide to copy the engineers on the return trip and save some money.

When they get to the station, they buy one ticket for the return trip. To their astonishment, the engineers don’t buy a ticket at all.

“How are you going to travel without a ticket?” says one perplexed accountant.

“Watch and you’ll see,” answered an engineer.

When they board the train all three accountants cram into a restroom and the three engineers cram into another one nearby. The train departs.

Shortly afterward, one of the engineers leaves his restroom and walks over to the restroom where the accountants are hiding. He knocks on the door and says, “Tickets, please!” and takes the only ticket from accountants.

Traveling Engineers and Accountants
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Wife and Girlfriend

An architect, an artist and an engineer were discussing whether it was better to spend time with the wife or a girlfriend.

The architect said he enjoyed time with his wife, building a solid foundation for an enduring relationship.

The artist said he enjoyed time with his girlfriend, because of the passion and mystery he found there.

The engineer said, I like both.

Both? they asked.

Engineer: Yeah. If you have a wife and a girlfriend, they will each assume you are spending time with the other woman, and you can go to the lab and get some work done.

Wife and Girlfriend
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Marrying a Software Engineer

This is a warning for women planning to marry software engineers in the form of a conversation between a husband (software engineer) and his wife. Look before you leap!!!

SCENE: A wife is waiting for her husband who is a software engineer. After
some time, the husband arrives.
HUSBAND: (Opening the door and entering in) Hi dear! I am LOGGED IN.

WIFE: Thanks god that you have arrived. Have you brought the Saree (an Indian dress)?
HUSBAND: BAD COMMAND OR FILE NAME.

WIFE: But I told you about it in the morning.
HUSBAND: ERRONEOUS SYNTAX. ABORT, RETRY, CANCEL.

WIFE: O my God…. Ok forget it. Tell me where’s your salary?
HUSBAND: FILE IN USE, READ ONLY,TRY AFTER SOME TIME.

WIFE: At least give me your credit card. So that I can do some shopping.
HUSBAND: SHARING VIOLATION. ACCESS DENIED.

WIFE: I made a mistake in marrying you.
HUSBAND: DATA TYPE MISMATCH.

WIFE: You are useless.
HUSBAND: BY DEFAULT.

WIFE: Who was there in the car with you this morning?
HUSBAND: SYSTEM UNSTABLE. PRESS ANY KEY TO REBOOT.

WIFE: Ok. leave it. Would you like to have some snacks?
HUSBAND: HARD DISK FULL.

WIFE: What is the relation between you and your receptionist?
HUSBAND: THE ONLY USER WITH RIGHT PERMISSION.

WIFE: What is my value in your life?
HUSBAND: UNKNOWN VIRUS DETECTED!!!

WIFE: Do you love me or your computer?
HUSBAND: TOO MANY PARAMETERS.

WIFE: I will go to my dad’s house!!!
HUSBAND: PROGRAMME PERFORMED ILLEGAL OPERATION. IT WILL
CLOSE.

WIFE: I will leave you for ever!!!
HUSBAND: CLOSE ALL PROGRAMMES AND LOG IN FOR ANOTHER
USER.

WIFE: It is worthless talking to you husband. Shut down the computer.
WIFE: I am going.
HUSBAND: ITS NOW SAFE TO TURN OFF YOUR COMPUTER.

Marrying a Software Engineer
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