Miserable Snail

One day a man was sitting on his sofa at home when he heard a knock at the door. He got up to see who it was but when he opened the door no one was there. Just as he was about to sit down he heard the knock again but when he got there again, there was no one at the door.

He scratched his head, looked around for a second and looked down to see a tiny snail on the porch.
He picked up the snail, threw it into a field across the street and headed back inside to watch television again.

Three Years Later

The same man is sitting on his sofa watching TV and hears a knock at the door. He gets up and goes to see who`s there and there is no one.

He looks around for a second and just as he is about to close the door, he looks down and sees the snail who looks back up and says “What the Hell was that all about!!?”.

A Snail and Three Turtles

A snail was moving along the beach when he happened to look back behind him and saw three turtles wearing leather jackets.

After moving along for about four weeks, the snail looked back again and saw that the three turtles were still there and closing in on him. So, the snail picked up his pace.

After about six more weeks, the snail looked back again, and saw that the turtles were still chasing him. And they were getting closer and closer! So, he kept on going as fast as he could.

After another few weeks, the turtles finally caught up with the snail and mugged him, took all of his clothes and the keys to his car.

After another couple of weeks, the snail got to a pay phone and called the police. “I`ve been mugged by three turtles wearing leather jackets! You need to get down here and take a report or do something!” he said.

“Can you give us a description of the turtles?” asked the police officer.

“No, I can`t. It all happened too fast!” cried the snail.

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