Archives for September 2020

Confessing Crimes

Bill sat alone in the hospital room at his dying wife’s beside. It was difficult to hear her above the many life sustaining devices, as her voice was little more than a hoarse whisper. “Bill darling,” she breathed. “I’ve got a confession to make before I go… I … I’m the one who took the $10,000 from your safe in the house … I spent it on a fling with your best friend Jimmy. And it was I who forced your mistress to leave the community in utter disgrace. I’m afraid I also was the one who reported you to the IRS for income tax evasion…”

“That’s all right dearest; don’t even give it a second thought.” said Bill. “I have a small confession too. I’m the one who poisoned you.”

Right Click

Tech Support: “I need you to right-click on the Desktop.”

Customer: “Ok.”

Tech Support: “Did you get a pop-up menu?”

Customer: “No.”

Tech Support: “Ok. Right click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?”

Customer: “No.”

Tech Support: “Ok, sir. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?”

Customer: “Sure, you told me to write ‘click’ and I wrote click’.”

The Elephant is Dead

Joe: Why are you crying?

Smith: The Elephant is dead.

Joe: Was he your pet?

Smith: No, but I am the one who must dig his grave.

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